Saturday, April 4, 2009

It is getting warm and I am sad.

As the weather gets warmer I see more and more people out and about and that should make me happy, but it actually makes me sad.

I see couples or just people alone on their two wheel bike and realize I can't do that. I haven't riden a bike since I was probably 14 years old. I so desperately want to ride a bike, I just don't have the balance to ride a bike, I need to ride a three wheel bike. That's fine with me. But have you ever tried to find one? They are impossible to find and if you find the right one you want, expect to pay an arm and a leg.

One night after dinner I would love to go for a walk around the neighborhood with Sven, how nice would that be. For most, yes it would, for me, can't do it. Even holding onto Sven's hand, I pull on his arm, veer off to the side and trip all while tireing myself out, same thing with my walker.

And running, I would love to just run. But alas my coordination is gone. If I were to run now I would just trip and fall and most would point and laugh.

So I should be happy, and I am. Happy that it is starting to get warm and sunny and I can wear my capris and sandals, but sad that I can't be like everyone else, that's all that I want.


Angie said...

That is so sad. I wish you could have what you want.

Sassy said...

Aw, Becks, that breaks my heart. I so wish the doctors could figure this out and find something to help you. It's so not fair.